We’ve all been there.
Being an adult is often synonymous with being busy. There is never enough time in the day to do both what needs to be done and what you actually want to do. With the transition from summer to fall, Hannah’s life will speed up with the impending school year, and the way we spend our time together will change. As priorities shift and time becomes more scarce, it’s not uncommon for relationships to become strained. However, with a stressful and busy first year under our belts, Hannah and I are well-equipped for the coming year.
These are some of the ways we make time for each other.
Tip #1. Stay in Touch
One of the most essential things you can do to make time for your partner is to stay in touch. Short phone calls, texting, sending each other social media posts – these are all small ways to communicate throughout the day. This is a tip I learned from my parents. After over forty years of marriage, they still prioritize communication when they’re apart. My mother works during the week, while my father is retired and works at home. Every day when my mother is at her office, my father calls to check in. If my mother hasn’t heard a word from my father, she calls him to check in and to make sure he’s not cheating, of course. Finding small ways to stay in touch when you are apart from your partner can really keep that flame burning.
Tip #2. Make the Most of Your Mornings
Mornings can be one of the best times to cram in those extra moments. Most of us are working people; we have places to be, people to see, and things to do. Hannah and I normally like to wake up at the same time. Now keep in mind, she sometimes has to be up at the crack of dawn and I’m usually not having that. However, when we do get to spend mornings together, we make the most of them. The purpose of waking up at the same time is to have extra time to catch up, talk, and more importantly, to communicate before your busy days get started.
Use your mornings that you have together to sit and have breakfast or to plan your days. Another perk of communicating in the morning is finding out what each of your schedules will look like throughout the day. This gives both you and your partner the opportunity to call or text during these free moments. Guys, remember tip one? Stay in touch!
Tip #3. Have Date Nights, In or Out.
Going on dates is probably one of the most universal things that every couple has experienced at least once. If you don’t like dates, that’s okay, call it whatever fits you best. After all, the most important part of date night is spending time together. Date nights give both you and your partner the time to relax and share your time together away from the everyday stressors of life. Hannah and I love to have date nights in.
By “in”, I mean inside our home.
We like lying on our couch, picking a movie to watch and indulging in whatever snack we’re obsessed with in that moment. We do like to go out, but let’s face it, we don’t always feel like going out. Not everyone is an “in” person and that’s fine. You can have your date night out as well. Pick your favorite restaurant or a place you both love and make the most of a date night there. Life gets crazy. We don’t always have time to do consistent date nights out, so it’s nice to have some variety for you and your partner to choose from.
Tip #4. Get Things Done Together
Sometimes I dread doing chores, running errands, etc., but things still need to get done. One of the ways Hannah and I make time for each other is doing those things together. When there is a lot to get done and those things are getting in the way of any free time you guys may have together, do them together. I’ll be 100% honest here, I don’t like chores. They’re boring and definitely not therapeutic to me, but I still do them because you gotta do what you gotta do. Hannah, on the other hand, can clean until she physically can’t clean anymore. Doing the daily chores together may or may not suck depending on who you are, but hey, at least you’ll be together.
Tip #5. Make Future Plans.
When life is really kicking your ass and you and your partner just can’t seem to make time for each other, make plans for the future. Sometimes, life gets hectic and all you and your partner have time for is “hi” and “bye”. Making plans for date nights in advance can go along ways or even planning a vacation or a relaxing day together on off days. Whatever the plans may be, making these plans and having something to look forward to can help you both get through those crazy busy days.
Tip #6. When All Else Fails, Re-evaluate your Schedules.
If you and your partner just can’t seem to make any free time for each other, consider re-evaluating your situation to see if there is anything else that can be done. Sometimes, we are working more than we have to and I understand this because I tend to work until I’m falling asleep. But there comes a time where we have to ask ourselves: “Do I need to work this much? Or am I working this much because I want to?”
I’m usually working too much because I want to.
There are only so many hours in a day. We can only do what we can and then save the rest for the next day. Saving the rest of your work for another day just may give you that extra time to spend time with your partner before the day is gone.
If you are in a relationship, it’s probably because you at least kind of like that person, right?
They have something to offer and that’s why you’re with them. It’s important to have a healthy balance of work and play in your life. You don’t have to drop work for play or play for work, but you can make the two work together for you. Hannah and I always try to prioritize time together. I try to close my computer and stop obsessively checking my email, and she tries to stay off her phone long enough to get through movie night. Even during the busiest of times, it’s important to prioritize one another and value your time together.
Don’t forget to check out our last post about why we started this blog here.