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If you read the title, our answer is both.

Hi guys! So we’ve been extremely busy these last few weeks. It feels like we have 50 things to do at any given moment, and honestly, we’ve been feeling overwhelmed. Because of this, we felt like this was a good time to express our mindset lately and just the way we think abut life in general. Through all of this chaos, we’ve been asking ourselves one question pretty frequently: are things happening to us or for us?
The answer to that question is never black or white. As two women who like to consider themselves full grown adults, we still like to whine and complain like little children. We don’t have anything against children (we love kids!), and we suppose whining and complaining is just a natural thing to do. It’s like a form of venting or self expression. It doesn’t always mean anything at all. But with all of this whining and complaining, it’s easy to feel like “why me?” when things don’t go as planned.

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Now, we don’t want to sound cliche or anything, but do you guys know the saying, “everything happens for a reason?” Well, this is a similar concept. We like to live by the saying, “when one door closes, another opens.” If you follow this mentality, then you’re more likely to think things are happening for you because those things will turn out for the best in the long run.

How can I tell if things are happening to me or for me?

To us, it’s all about your mindset. If you’re experiencing one bad thing happening after another, ask yourself this: “what lesson am I supposed to be learning from all of this?” There’s usually a lesson to be learned within the negative things in life. If we make a mistake, even if it’s really bad, we can still learn something from it. Instead of falling victim to the “why me?” mindset, we self-reflect in order to grow. It’s important that we always hold ourselves responsible.
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If you can learn something beneficial from the negatives, then you have another positive.

Once the negativity blows over, we’re usually able to reflect and realize that because of this negative experience, something positive was able to bloom. It might be a coincidence, but when something that we perceive to be negative happens for us, something positive soon follows. So again, we ask ourselves, “are things happening to us or for us?” Did this have to happen in order for this to happen?”
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We’re both in our early 20’s, so if there’s any time to feel personally victimized by life’s cruel and unusual side effects, it’s now. Honestly, we have both been through enough to blame life itself, but we’re the people we are today because of these cruel and unusual experiences. A few years ago, we could have easily said that things were happening to us, but we’ve learned countless lessons from these things. Without these experiences, we wouldn’t know what we know today. Today, we feel like things are happening for us, and that’s growth!
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Okay guys, that’s all for today!
Until next time,
Ariana & Hannah
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9 comments

  1. Love it especially the part when you say, “ask yourself what am I supposed to learn.” If there is one great lesson I have learned in my 33 years on this earth is “When it rains look for rainbows, when its dark look for stars.” Life is always going to be a wild ride, it’s all in our perception that defines us.

  2. That’s such a great attitude to have, to look at all things, even negatives, as something to learn from! That’s something that I’m always trying to remember, though it gets hard at times.

  3. You guys have the best blog photos I’ve seen in a long time!! Great outlook, I tend to try to learn from every situation as well. It’s the only way to have some peace in your life!

  4. I’m still struggling to get over having the “to” mindset while going through it, but afterwards, it’s much easier to have the “for” mindset. Hindsight gives a much better perspective, and allows me to see what lessons I was supposed to learn from it.

    1. We can honestly say we’re guilty of having the “to” mindset while going through difficult situations. This is okay. Self-reflection has really saved us a lot of negativity.

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